I checked out Paripesa this morning while waiting for a flight. I’d been hoping to do some gambling before being crammed between two strangers, which is one of the most difficult situations to be in for a compulsive masturbator like myself. Unfortunately, I got a message saying “Access to this website is prohibited in the USA.” Yeah, I ended up sulking, cranky and blue-balled for hours while traveling through the sky and over the ocean in what many would consider a goddamn miracle of modern technology.
Bet Visa! It may sound like you can bet using only Visa as your form of payment, but that is not necessarily true. Since we’re being true here (and that’s always the case on ThePornDude), I have no fucking clue why this Indian online casino calls itself BetVisa. But here we are, standing here with our dicks in our hands and wondering what the fuck the name is all about.
1win There are three things that will always retain their value, no matter what happens. A twelve-point zero earthquake could rattle our major cities, hurricanes could tear the coasts apart, deadly plagues could spread, or the whole damn world could end. Still, these three things will be as valuable as they ever were. Debouchery Survives All Calamities
Number one is sex. The vagina is akin to an ATM that never runs out of money. It doesn’t matter how desperate for survival a man is. He could be on the brink of starvation and still trade a sandwich for a blowjob if they haven’t had one in a while. That’s how much our penis is in charge of the show. Our tiny monkey brain is fully prepared to sacrifice everything if it means our genetics have a chance of continuing our lineage onward into the future.
Oshi Casino Boys, it’s time to piss your money away. If you’re a grown man over or under the age of 42, you should know that the best way to turn your hard-earned cash into dookie is to spend it on expensive wine or gamble it away on a slot machine. Expensive wine tastes like cheap wine – all wine tastes like shit. Get a beer and gamble your money away like a real man, all right?
TCL99 Are you ready to get your gamble on, mother fucker? I know you are! Which is why I want you to take a good hard fucking look at all of the amazing gambling opportunities that are coming your way over on TCL99! This is perfect if you live in Australia and don’t want to deal with going to a physical casino and standing around other people. Did you know that some of those people actually shit their pants on purpose so they don’t have to leave their table or machine? You don’t want to be around any of that shit (literally, that fucking shit), do you?
Rocket Play Since Covid, a significant number of users have shifted from brick-and-mortar casinos to online casino platforms. It explains the rise of several websites that offer incredible online casino experiences. And well, Rocket Play is an excellent example of such a website. The site provides users with an abundance of online games you can play and, hopefully, win fucking big. And the best part about everything? You have more than plenty of ways to deposit and withdrawal your winnings. You don’t have to handle all of that yucky paper money at your local casino. Instead, you just have to look at all of the Rocket Play games, place your bets, win big, and come back for more!
King Palace Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the last few years or some shit, you’ll more than likely know that I, The Porn Dude, have done more than enough to earn my crown as being the king of porn over the years and, let me tell you, it’s sure as shit the kind of crown that is not easy to earn! But when people look at me as a connoisseur of vice, they often tend to think that my world revolves around clit, cunt, and female ejaculate when, in reality, the world of vice runs far deeper than that. Yep, I also enjoy the wild realm of gambling and betting whenever I get a rare five minutes away from the world of porn.
Casino Days Are you looking for a place to go to find all kinds of casino games and more, but you don’t want to have to go to a physical casino? I do not blame you! Who wants to go to a place like that where people piss and shit their pants? Not I! Then stay at home and gamble – or anywhere you please – on Casino Days! Why is that? Because Casino Days is your ticket to gambling on thousands of casino games that will hopefully see winning big, big, BIG! See what all the fuss is about by visiting Casino Days today – but only after seeing what I said about it right here on ThePornDude!
Golden Bet! Whether I’m training my battle-hardened dick in an intense porn marathon or perusing the offerings of some red light district with the mission to act out what I’ve seen in my favorite smut flicks IRL with a willing harlot, I’m a guy who appreciates all manner of vice. But once I’ve drained my balls, I’m not done there! Sure, the neon lights of a bordello populated by cock-hungry whores never fail to lure me in, but I equally have a soft spot for the alluring lights of a casino as well! However, when you’ve been balls-deep in porn for hours on end, the thought of dressing up to go to a physical casino can be a pain in the ass!
Dazzle Casino! Do you want to find all kinds of fucking casino games that will have you playing your brains out and hopefully winning big? But you don’t want to visit a physical casino to make that shit happen? Then bro, I want you to know all about this online casino that you need to know about! It’s called Dazzle Casino, and it is here that you’re going to find so many fucking games to play and betting opportunities of all types, that you may not know where to fucking start! That’s okay – you’re already not going to step in human shit by staying home and playing on an online casino. You wouldn’t get that kind of amenity if you visited a physical casino, because there’s people going to the bathroom in their pants all around you.